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Wednesday, 26 November 2014

What I'm Thankful for 2014

Hi, this an american tradition and one founded in unpleasantness but that's not important because the spirit of giving thanks is something I think we could do with doing more. And if we imported Halloween why not a time of reflection and merriment too?

This year has not been pleasant for me and there were certainly some things I didn't expect but I am thankful for how the year has gone. I am thankful that my youtube has grown exponentially bigger than it used to be. I am thankful Nine Worlds Geek Fest was so awesome and I met many amazing people. I am thankful that my, rushed at the last minute, dissertation on sharkploitation films passed. I am thankful that the new kitten Ronnikin has helped my old cat Patch and bought joy to all my family. I am thankful that the time of lying and manipulation within my family is over. I am thankful that despite my fears and some close calls my family have stood by me and supported me. I am thankful that my NaNoWriMo experiment went over so well, I am thankful that Doctor Who has shown it can be progressive. I am thankful that TV shows are getting a lot better, even if I can currently just get The Flash. I am thankful for the opportunities I have been given that I cannot yet tell you about.

Most of all I am thankful for you reading this now, my friends and family and blog readers or youtube watchers. You have stood by me this year no matter how stupid or dickish I may have been. It has been my dream to get paid for my writing for so long and though this is just the beginning, within the first two or three months of having my blog monetised I have made one penny each month from the views upon my blog. My reviews and my NaNoWriMo parts or short stories. You have been reading them and it does count. It lifts my spirit to see that you care about what I write and in the coming year I hope to cater to you more.

Thank you all of you.

Alex Jahans 2014

We have to save the world but you can still relax.

Sunday, 23 November 2014

The Venus Trap Part 17 The Final Battle

The Venus Trap
Alex Jahans
Online Version
Part 17 – The Final Battle

Butterfly woke from a deep sleep completely relaxed and refreshed. She was in the hamster cage with Lucy and Iris. Lucy was wearing a suit and Iris was wearing trousers and a tshirt.

“Hey” called Butterfly “What happened?”

Lucy strode over to kneel beside Butterfly and said “I'm sorry. I had no part in it but I heard what happened. You ran forward and retrieved everyone's clothes and armour. You broke the rules and blew our cover. The Unleasher wanted to act right then but Galla decided that it would be better to lay low for a month sowing seeds of discord and training everyone how to fight.”

“Right” said Butterfly “Then what happened?”

“You really don't remember?” asked Lucy

“No” said Butterfly and the hairs standing up on the back of her neck made her realise something. She reached her left hand up to her neck and her face contorted in horror as she felt around her neck in desperation “Lucy, where's my collar?”

Lucy swallowed “The Unleasher had to make an example of you to maintain our cover. He walked you over to the donation bed and ordered that you be harvested completely. He removed one of your hearts before removing your regenerative capabilities.”

Butterfly's jaw dropped in horror “I'm – I mean – I've lived with my head being exploded, I have had hearts torn out and eaten. Regardless of whether I remember it or not. I would have felt that betrayal and slow agonising death. Christ, I want to vomit.”

“Hush” said Lucy stroking Butterfly “You're not supposed to get distressed”

“Not supposed to get distressed? I was dissected alive!” cried Butterfly.

Lucy nodded sadly “They wanted to lie to you, alter your mind and pretend something less horrific had happened. Said it would be kinder. I said that was a crock of shit and they just didn't want you to think ill of them. I threatened to sacrifice myself and Iris if they wanted to lie to you. That was sufficient leverage to make the elder gods reconsider and keep all three of us in your hamster cage ping pong ball. The Unleasher has your collar if you ever want it back.”

“And Kitty?” asked Butterfly.

Lucy's face darkened “Kitty, Galla, Emilia and Bernice are harvested daily. Mariam and the Queen are allowed out of being harvested because they are guards.”

Butterfly grimaced “And it's been a month.”

“Yeah” said Lucy “Oh and my severed leg grew into another clone of me. Emilia's taking care of her and has named her Artemis. She's also been harvested. Look do you want to have a shower?”

Butterfly nodded and followed Lucy out one of the tubes.

Iris watched them go and spoke into her Logicio ear piece “The Butterfly has taken the bait. Repeat, the Butterfly has taken the bait. Unleasher, we are go for assembly. Repeat we are go for assembly.”


Butterfly and Lucy returned to find Iris giggling.

Butterfly approached Iris “Hey girl, ever fancied a threesome?”

Lucy burst out laughing.

Iris spoke into her bluetooth. “We are go for drop”


Lucy, Butterfly and Iris appeared before Galla and the Unleasher.

“I'm sorry” said the Unleasher

“We're both sorry” said Galla “But you are an asset and now you are ready for war.”

“Look around you” said Iris

General Galbion, Diamonte, Judith, Lily, Galbion's Right Hand woman, Olaf Gamalzes, Emilia Auditorie the SALFy, Bernice the mutite shark, Greta the cyborg shark, Kitty, The Queen, The Hooded Justice, Flitzy, the orcs, the fairies, the plasticlones, the valkyries, the Asylum Seekers and the victims of the pit, they all stood, fully healed and recovered, armed to the teeth waiting for orders.

Galla said “This is why I did that to you. To give you an army with which to defeat the Bam-Kursh and end the suffering.”

“Freeing you as a consequence” said Butterfly

“Naturally” said Galla

“Is this what it is to be a weapon Farsh-nuke?” asked Butterfly

The Unleasher shrugged “I grew from a heart when the Bam-Kursh tried to kill me so long ago remember?”

Butterfly nodded “And how do we get out of the pit?”

“Fly” said Galla “We will follow”

Butterfly nodded.

Lucy kissed her on the cheek “Fly well and maybe we'll meet again.”

Butterfly swallowed remover her plasma rifle from a pocket and flew.

Butterfly flew up out of the pit and down to the front door of the Bam-Kursh's tower without being noticed or noticing anything odd. When she touched the ground though all hell broke loose...

Galla and the Unleasher appeared either side of Butterfly, Quantum Oscillators aimed and working away at the door. Lucy and Greta appeared either side of Butterfly, guarding Galla and the Unleasher. Iris and the Hooded Justice protected their sides.

General Galbion and half the orcs, Plasticlones Asylum Seekers and victims of the pit appeared guarding the road to the right.

Diamonte and the other half of the orcs, Plasticlones Asylum Seekers and victims of the pit appeared guarding the road to the left.

Olaf led a group comprising Galbion's Right Hand woman, Judith, 2 weresharks and a fairy as they mowed down down the enemy behind their battle lines.

Emilia led Artemis the Queen, 2 weresharks and a fairy as they took out fighters behind enemy lines to the left.

Lily, Kitty and Bernice controlled the battlefield by listening into intelligence gained through blood control and using calculated attacks to thin out the enemy in areas of weakness and bunch them up where they could be most easily killed.

Flitzy maintained ultimate authority over the fairies and managed how many fairies were allocated to any specific task at a given time. Be it replenishing the ammo and health of the allies, using shock and awe to distract and confuse the enemies or focusing fire in a specific area to save a unit under heavy fire.

Butterfly cast shield spells to protect and buff her friends but between shield spells a lucky shot exploded Iris's head and the Hooded Justice staggered back, injured.


The door opened.


The Cowboy and 50 Architects of Chaos appeared.

The Cowboy cried “Get the Bam-Kursh!” and turned to shoot at the enemy behind him.

The Unleasher picked Butterfly up and carried her inside.

Galla followed and shut the door behind them.


Inside the tower was a spiral stair case leading up and down.

The Unleasher started heading up

Galla said “We go down.”

“Why?” asked Butterfly “The Bam-Kursh is at the top of the tower.”

Galla nodded “And the Unleasher will provide a satisfactory distraction but we can't hope to beat him until I have met the other Galla and freed myself. Now go downstairs.”

Butterfly sighed and headed downstairs followed by Galla.

“I really hope I don't have to kill you” said Butterfly sadly.

“Likewise” said Galla.

At the bottom they found a short skinny dark skinned woman.

“Hello” she said “I am Galla Placidia, Regent for Emperor Valentian the third. Would someone please explain to me what the hell is going on?”

Galla said “Ever had strange dreams or nightmares, felt that your thoughts or actions were not your own, that you can remember things you have never done. I chose you Galla as I chose this woman here to be my Butterfly. My soul lies shattered across all the women I have bought to this plane of existence and now I shall rise.”

The Regent of Rome said “Yes. Yes, I see now. What must we do?”

Galla kissed the Regent of Rome on the lips playfully then pulled back to say “How else is a god born?”

Butterfly asked nervously “Why did you bring me along here?”

The Regent of Rome stared at Butterfly and smiled.

Galla said “I need energy to perform this ritual. I need life force. You have it in abundance and that will leave me free to take out the Bam-Kursh”

Butterfly nodded slowly “And since I am no one's pet after what you did there is no socio-cultural stigma to this. And I suppose there are worse ways to have your life energy drained.”


The Unleasher had been stripped and her hand and legs were cuffed together behind her back to let her hang from a crane as a pinata. The Bam-Kursh was slashing at her with his sword cane.

“I just think we can murder bad guys.” said the Unleasher.

The Bam-Kursh laughed “The innocent and the good are much more fun to torture, to feel their joy and idealism obliterated by pain!”


The Unleasher flinched “I'll let you possess me just please let them live.”

Galla strode in her eyes green. With a wave of her hand the chains holding the Unleasher to the crane melted away and Unleasher was pulled to her right hand.

“Nice pinata, I might have to have a swing myself some time.” said Galla.

The Bam-Kursh glared at her “How dare you? The Farsh-nuke is my property, he sold herself to me!”

Galla cackled “You really don't remember me do you Bam-Kursh well maybe this will jog your memory.”

Galla held her open hand before her and started squeezing thin air “Shut up”

The Bam-Kursh started suffocating “Mummy!”

Galla grinned “Who keeps the monsters from your space? Mother. Who tells the bad guys to behave? Mother. Who makes you do the unpleasant things for the greater good? Mother. I'm back Bam-Kursh and I have had enough of your games. Go! To! Your! Body!”

The spirit of the Bam-Kursh fled Flavia Galla and she collapsed.

“Go see to Butterfly” said Galla and she chased after the spirit of the Bam-Kursh.

The Unleasher pulled on her clothes and headed downstairs where the blissed out Regent of Romew and Butterfly stripped her again.


When Butterfly the Unleasher and the regent of Rome finally opened the doors it was a blood bath.

The Cowboy, Lucy and Greta were both shot up and bleeding heavily. The Hooded Justice and Iris were dead.

The right flank were all but dead. Galbion and her Right Hand woman had been vaporised. Judith lay dying as a fairy saw to her, Olaf was fine since she was a wereshark and had played conservatively when she needed to.

The left flank was equally demolished. Diamonte's head had exploded and Emilia and Artmeis had ultimately died protecting the Queen who was being seen to by a fairy.

Lily and Bernice died but Kitty survived just and was being seen to by a group of fairies.

Flitzy landed on Butterfly's shoulder “I saved some of them, well their memories and a sample of their dna. You will have to extract them from me. I am not long for this world.”

Butterfly nodded and mind melded with Flitzy then with a last gasp Flitzy died in her arms.

Butterfly broke down crying.

The Unleasher hugged her and tried to pretend that everything would be alright but she felt hollow inside too.


Gfaxxy Quluwmcy stepped out of a rocket and said “We will take you to our ship and give you somewhere to live while you grieve. We will also clear up this mess.”

Galla strode up “Good. That's the Bam-Kursh dealt with. May I join you?”

The Unleasher stepped between Galla and Butterfly “I don't care if it is not my right, I don't care if you are more powerful than me. I care a great deal for this woman and all you have done is cause her pain. No more.”

Galla chuckled “Farsh-nuke, really?”

The Unleasher lifted Galla up by the collar. “I have murdered the ones I love, I have eaten people and I have crushed their souls into dirt. I have more blood on my hands than you will ever know and you make me sick. Cut the crap or I will end you!”

Galla asked Butterfly “Is she serious?”

Butterfly nodded “She killed me remember?”

Galla swallowed “Okay maybe I should look at modifying my ego but please don't kill me, I can be an asset in the war.”

Lucy laughed “Gfaxxy take us away”


The next two days were spent recovering from the final battle. Olaf, Kitty, The Cowboy, The Queen, Lucy, Greta and Butterfly grew close as they shared their stories of the battle and commiserated. The Regent of Rome drank with them as she shared her tale of the saga. The Unleasher and Galla spent those two days having very heated discussions in the bar.

By the third day the Unleasher went over to speak to the others and was soon singing karaoke and playing poker with the others.

On the morning of the fourth Butterfly went over to the Unleasher at breakfast and said “I know why you're here, shall we try it?”

The Unleasher nodded and they started working away in the hologram suite.

A month later the Unleasher led everyone into the suite for the grand reveal.

They pulled away the curtain and everyone marvelled at three women in glorified refrigerators.

“Presenting the Hooded Justice, Iris Timeweaver and Emilia Auditorie.” said the Unleasher.

The Queen asked “Can I get an Emilia for my country? She's very skilled.”

The Unleasher nodded.

Lucy asked “And if I wanted an Iris for reasons of my own.”

Galla entered, cheeks red, tearing up and hugged the Unleasher and Butterfly.

The next day Gfaxxy approached Galla and said “Look we need to go, nothing against you just this whole war thing. So can we sort stuff out.”

Galla nodded and then she got the Regent of Rome, Lucy and Butterfly in a room with her “So who wants me?”

The Regent of Rome said “I could use your power.”

Lucy nodded in agreement “I can't run everything and I don't have experience of it so this Galla Placidia will aid me in my mission.”

Butterfly nodded “They need someone like you. They need an ultimate pragmatist. Galla I and the Unleasher just want to travel and help people.”

The elder god known as mother moved into the regent of Rome and said “Then it is agreed, we make preparations to leave.”


Galla, Butterfly, Kitty, Olaf and the Unleasher took 2 clones of Iris, 2 clones of Emilia, 1 clone of the Hooded Justice, and the Queen.

Gfaxxy, The Elder God Galla, Lucy, Greta and the Cowboy took a clone of Emilia and the Hooded Justice with them and the cloning boothes.

As they were about to leave and the elder god Galla on Gfaxxy's ship was gathering up everybody for the move back to their respective times and places she felt something odd and pulled it aboard. Amy materialised “Hi guys, what did I miss?”

Lucy started laughing.


Butterfly and the Unleasher's ship dropped off one of the clones of Iris back in her old life then they dropped off the Queen with one of the Emilia clones and stopped by Woking.

They found out Campuss had fallen to her death when Woking had vanished and Galla was heart broken until Mariam invited Sandra round and shut the door of the spaceship before she could leave.

“It's bigger on the inside” said Sandra

“Yes it is” said Galla “Now allow me to introduce my friends. Gal with wings there is Butterfly. The one in back is the Hooded Justice or Mariam. The one who looks a bit like a boulder is Olaf Gamalzes. The shadowy figure in the cosplay is Emilia Auditorie, a resistence fighter from a far future parallel universe and the women reclining on the sofa are Kitty and Iris. We are the Venusian Cavalry. Now answer me one simple question: All of reality, every universe there ever was, every star, every planet, every time, where do you want to start?”

Sandra swallowed and made her answer.

The door that wasn't there before was no longer there again. The Venusian Cavalry were off on another adventure.

Saturday, 22 November 2014

The Venus Trap Part 16 The Pit

The Venus Trap
Alex Jahans

Online Version
Part 16 – The Pit

Butterfly stirred from her slumber. She remembered the bolt of pain as a dart pierced her neck. She remembered an assassin telling her to enter the pit so they could rescue Lucy and then another bolt of pain as she was tranquillized and so her memory grew spotty.

She remembered the outnumbering solders swarming and stripping them. The muted cries and threats from her peers as weapons were taken away. She remembered the bite as tight metal handcuffs were secured around her wrists and ankles, the rattling of chains as her hands and feet were yoked together behind her back. She felt the shift of gravity as a crane was used to lift her up into the air and down into the pit.

She remembered the screaming and heat as they approached the bottom of the pit and the overwhelming smell of blood and rot. She remembered soldiers unloading her and her friends and carrying them like cargo to a rubbish chute set in a thick concrete wall. She remembered landing on what felt like glass and being carried. Then she blacked out.

Butterfly woke up to find herself wearing a crude leather skirt and tshirt. Her peers were similarly dressed, even the Queen. They were in a deep cavern open to sunlight. The floor was covered in a centimetre of sand or dust. A tall thick set woman with warts, scars and signs of fungal infection was watching over them. She held a big stick that culminated in and end covered in what looked like human teeth.

“Where are we?” asked Butterfly

The woman laughed “You are kidding me?”

Butterfly groaned and started stretching “So we're in the pit?”

The woman nodded “Let me guess? Outsiders? You clubbed together to visit Rome and end this shit? You made it through the gladiatorial trials and made a play for the big tower? And now? Pahahaha! You're so screwed?”

Butterfly sighed “So what do we do?”

The woman thought for a moment then said “Well now you have clothes and are awake to really feel the pain you get to go forward and donate your skin, bones and hair to other poor unfortunates who end up down here. Then you get to have a nice rest as you heal before you perform your duty to extract donations from other poor unfortunates and if you're really lucky and don't rapidly replace your lost bones and skin you are tortured and slowly carved away at to provide food for the other inmates and alternate with torturing your friends. And if you're really lucky and make others feel extreme pain without ruining their effectiveness as torturers you may get a big stick and the right to help run this pain machine.”

The colour drained from Butterfly's face, she hadn't thought anything could be worse than the conspiracy she helped dismantle but this was it. She vomited.

A short woman with a false leg made from someone's thigh bone walked forward flanked by two tall body builders who each had an arm missing.

The tall woman Butterfly had been speaking to spoke with the short woman. After a moment the short woman walked over to Butterfly.

Butterfly got to her feet and saluted “You want me to make my donation, sir!”

The short woman laughed bitterly “What limb do you want to donate?”

Butterfly answered “Take my left leg”

The short woman nodded and the grunts with missing arms escorted butterfly over to bench made from skin stretched over bones.

Butterfly laid in the bed.

A short ginger woman gave Butterfly a sad smile as she listed to the other short woman's instructions.

“I'm sorry” said the ginger woman and she carved into Butterfly's flesh without anaesthetic, using knifes made by sharpening bone.

The ginger woman exposed the bones of Butterfly's leg and cauterised any bleeding by virtue of bone heated over fire then she carefully cut the tendons connecting her leg bones to her pelvis and foot before she removed the leg bones. She carefully placed the leg bones to one side before slicing off Butterfly's left foot, setting that aside and severing the meat of Butterfly's left leg from her arse. The meat was set aside and Butterfly's wounds were cauterised then the ginger woman removed the skin from her arms and carefully removed her teeth one by one, cauterising wounds as she went until at last Butterfly had her hair cut.

Butterfly was left to writhe in agony as Kitty, Galla and Mariam watched while the resources gained from her were ferried around to be made use of. Then Butterfly was carried over to a left dusty healing corner.


Butterfly woke up to find a tall beautiful dark skinned woman stroking her hair. “Hey honey, are awake?”

Butterfly tried to speak before giving up and nodding

The beautiful woman introduced herself “My name is Iris and this is the healing corner.”

Butterfly wrote a message in the dust with her finger “Why are you naked?”

Iris laughed “Good question! I was left for dead in the gladiatorial arena so I didn't have to make a donation. The Unleasher says that as a result of that its not fair that I wear clothes but it's okay she gave me a pill and now I don't feel the cold. She said I am to take special care of you and give you lots of cuddles and strokes as you are a kitten in human form, is that right?”

Butterfly nodded and wrote in the dust “Can I see her?”

Iris squeezed Butterfly “No silly, she's very busy but I can see if I can get a message to her if you'd like?”

Butterfly nodded.

Iris called out “Lucy, get the Unleasher to come over here please darling?”

Butterfly groaned and then she felt something stroking her left arm. She turned to see Galla who had donated her left arm.

Mariam was dragged over, she'd donated her right leg.

Kitty had donated her left arm.

The Queen had donated her left leg.

Flitzy had donated her legs.

Olaf had donated her right arm.

Emilia had donated her left leg.

Bernice had donated her left leg.

They all cried in despair, especially the shape shifters who had the double whammy of being mutilated and having their souls scarred so they were locked in these bodies. Flitzy could no longer feel her connection to the magic force that pervades reality and felt as though this truly was hell.

Lucy came over accompanied by the Unleasher.

Butterfly stared into the Unleasher's eyes and saw the man she'd last spoken to over a video feed on a septagonoid ship “Help me, Farsh-nuke” she wrote.


Butterfly and the Unleasher are suddenly standing, restored to perfect health, in a chilled room lined with pressurized gas canisters linked up with valves and piping to racks of computing.

“What is this place?” asks Butterfly

The Unleasher answers “Something you need to see

William Dickson Wright pauses for a moment, quietly drinking in the atmosphere. “Impressive.”

William walks to a computer terminal and starts waving his Quantum Oscillator about, scanning things. He lets out a little bit of the gas to test and where it leaks, reality itself dissolves into a black void. William licks this tiny speck of nothingness.

William says “Shit, this could actually work.”

The Farsh-nuke says “That’s bad.”

William says “Let me just check something.”

William focuses on the tip of his finger, turning it green then he uses the Quantum Oscillator to blast a scraping of his illogicity into the void. The void grows larger.

Butterfly asks “Why is William talking to himself?”

The Unleasher says “He's talking to me, to the Farsh-nuke within himself. Notice the flickering of green in his eyes when the Farsh-nuke takes over.”

The Farsh-nuke says “Shit.”

Butterfly says “Oh yeah I see now

William says “I am sorry Lucy.”

The Farsh-nuke says “That could obliterate everything.”

William says “It would solve the problem, the final problem. I could solve it.”

The Farsh-nuke says “Everything would cease to exist, to never have existed, time will be undone, everyone unborn.”

William says “I could do it, me. I could finally get something right for once.”

The Farsh-nuke says “No this is wrong, this is so wrong. This is the closest there has ever been or ever will be to evil.”

William says “But it won’t ever have been.”

The Farsh-nuke says “Lucy will die.”

William says “She will cease to exist. That’s different.”

The Farsh-nuke says “This can’t happen. I will not allow it to happen. I am many many horrific things but I can not let you do this, William.”

The Farsh-nuke plunges his hand into William’s chest and pulls out his heart. William laughs.

William says “I am a wereshark. I don’t need -”

The Farsh-nuke flashes with anger then picks up a glass vial containing close to pure logic.

The Farsh-nuke says “If I smash this glass at our feet, we’ll dissolve, you and I. We’ll die together.”

William says “You can’t.”

The Farsh-nuke says “I can.”

William says “Then do it.”

The Farsh-nuke says “Alright I will.”

The hand holding the vial utterly fails to budge.

William says “What’s the matter? Cat got your tongue?”

The Farsh-nuke says “But that’s impossible! Absolutely impossible!”

William says “That’s the problem with evil monsters? Always so naive about the clich├ęs they are invoking.”

The Farsh-nuke says “I am the great Farsh-nuke! The ever watchful spirit of chaos! It’s my job to protect the nothingness! This cannot be!”

William says “I know right? And my little dog too? She totally didn’t trounce your powers of possession did she? You must have known? I told you, she got it from me.”

The Farsh-nuke says “No. No, that’s too unbearable to think about.”

William says “That you’ve been living with me at my discretion? I know right? Isn’t it just the greatest? Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to come up with the final solution.”

William lowers the hand holding the vial and starts agitating it with his Quantum Oscillator.

The scene vanishes and switches to a younger Butterfly running down a corridor, she finds a septagonoid and cries “Quick, take me hostage! William is in your bomb room right now! He will wipe you all out unless you send him a video message right now, saying that you’ll kill me if he doesn’t stop plotting to save the multiverse and wipe out the Septagonoids!”

The Septagonoid says “Is your name Lucy?”

“Yes” says the younger Butterfly.

The Septagonoid clarifies “Sister Lucille Badass?”

The younger Butterfly says “That’s me.”

The Septagonoid says “Whatever you say maam, just please don’t kill me.”

The scene shifts back to show William in the chilled room.

William holds up a vial. He cries out jubilantly “I’ve done it! In this vial lies the answer to the oldest equation, the first equation, the equation that must never ever be solved! All I need do is break the glass of this vial and a chain reaction will begin. Time will be undone. Logic and illogicity will flatten out into a matt black void of silence. The classist view of nothingness will become actual canon for evermore!”

A buzzer sounds and a video feed of the younger Butterfly and the Septagonoid is projected onto a wall.

The Septagonoid says “Listen Mister William Dickson Wright Farsh-nuke sir! If you do not stop trying to save the multiverse and wiping us out then I will eradicate your good lady friend here!”

“Oh, really?” says William

The Septagonoid says “Indeed Sir! I will give her the most painful death, sir! Unless that is you stop trying to wipe us out so we can solve the final equation!”

William laughs. “I really don’t take well to threats!”

William blows illogicity into the solution in the vial. “Shame really to ruin such a fine solution but the fuckers asked for it.”

William smashes the vial on the ground then Tara materialises around him before hurriedly dematerialising.

The scene ends and Butterfly and the Unleasher are left to stand in a green void.

The Unleasher hugs Butterfly “You saved all of us. I owe you so very very much.”

Butterfly nuzzles the Unleasher “I've missed you so much you know and it's only been a month and a half since I left you. I'm all yours if you want me.”

The Unleasher pulled back “I won't lie I want to and I am still very protective of you but no I am the Unleasher now. I gifted myself to the Bam-Kursh to end our feud and the bloodshed. At least that's what was supposed to happen. I'm not fit to care for myself let alone another but we will talk properly. I won't lie it will probably mean more pain for you in the long term but I need my Lucy fit and well.”

Butterfly nodded “I understand, heal my friends too won't you?”

The Unleasher sighed “I can't make any promises. I can just about free your souls from the restrictions placed upon you by the Bam-Kursh but I can't regrow your skin and bones for you.”

Butterfly nodded “I trust you

The Unleasher grinned and kissed Butterfly on the forehead.

Butterfly woke up back in the pit. The Unleasher was leaning over her.

“Hush” said the Unleasher as she closed Butterfly's eyelids and laid the palm of her right hand on Butterfly's chest “Sleep and recover. I will wake you when we can chat.”


Butterfly woke after the deepest most pleasant sleep she had had in a long time. She yawned and stretched and realised her leg had regrown. She also realized her teeth were back.

Galla said “What did you give her to let us be so healed?”

Mariam and Emilia groaned.

Bernice said “Any of you feel like helping your other friends?”

Flitzy said “Meesa have a make whole spell, I shall heal the humans.”

Kitty said “Whatever you did, I'm glad you did it.”

Galla said more seriously “Butterfly what the hell did you give her?”

Butterfly said “I was her pet before I was yours. Plus I did save the multiverse.”

Galla said “I'm not letting you go Butterfly. It's great that you've met up with you're old owner but you're mine now.”

Lucy bounded over wearing a bikini “Hey Butterfly and Galla, you're better now. That's awesome. I tell you this Unleasher woman she is the best owner ever. Iris doesn't even realise she's her pet because the Unleasher brings her under so quickly Iris just thinks she falls asleep in her arms.”

Galla said “Oh yeah I noticed her yesterday. I thought I killed her.”

Lucy and Butterfly stared at Galla.

Galla shrugged “I had to get through the gladiatorial competition and she had a knife so I made her slit her own throat.”

Lucy said “Your owner is scary”

Butterfly laughed.

Iris woke up from her position beside Butterfly “Hey you're awake and healed? The Unleasher must really like you.

Butterfly asked “Iris, how would you like to join us? We're plotting rebellion and revolution.”

Iris said “I'd love to but I'd want some clothes before I started shanking guards”

Butterfly nodded “Lucy could you fetch the Unleasher please?”

Lucy nodded and bounded away.

Galla asked “Do you have anybody to miss you at home Iris?”

Iris stared at Galla

Butterfly said “My friend means, well I'm her pet and Lucy's pet and well she thinks you would make a good pet.”

Iris looked confused “I'm a journalist who can time travel, I am not a pet.”

Galla said “No but you would be a very valuable asset.”

The Unleasher appeared behind Iris “She's going to go back home to her family in central city and all of this will be but an unpleasant memory.”

Butterfly stared at the Unleasher, she knew that stance, it was the same William adopted when strange men had offered to buy her off William, it was a very protective and dominant posture.

Galla said “If you want Iris to not get involved I suggest you send her to help the other injured.”

The Unleasher caught the threat and nodded for Iris to go.

Butterfly said “Farsh-nuke meet the elder god behind this Venus Trap, otherwise known as Galla Placidia”

The Unleasher said “How annoyed would you be if I murdered her?”

Galla glared at the Unleasher “The Farsh-nuke as I live and breathe, I wondered when you'd turn up. I rather assumed you'd be a man.”

The Unleasher smiled “Do you really want to do this?”

Galla smiled “Oh I would love to.”

Mariam said “Galla, please don't kill the woman who has let us have our teeth back.”

Galla grimaced “Dammit! My host won't let me make a move towards you.”

The Unleasher chuckled “Yeah, it is a bitch when they assert agency over their own body isn't it?”

Galla turned and kissed Mariam “Fuck me, you beautiful woman.”

Butterfly asked “Do you know her?

The Unleasher shrugged “It's been a long time since I was an elder god out in the wild, I might not remember. Anyway how about you, you good?”

Butterfly nodded “So what happened to you, to make you into a woman?”

The Unleasher lay down beside the Butterfly “The Unleasher was a real woman. A resistance fighter for the Sylph Allied Liberation Front, she built a very clever bomb to make me feel what it was to be a woman.”

“And now you're running hell?” said Butterfly.

The Unleasher raised her eyebrow “How did you know?”

“Well for starters you have access to sylph pills to turn Iris but more importantly this is an economy that farms and exploits women as resources. If anybody else was running a torture system then they'd get hot coals, a rake and maybe some chains but otherwise they'd be left to rot. This system as crude and cruel as it is gives people clothes and weapons and soap and other things that can be made from harvesting women.” said Butterfly.

The Unleasher nodded and lay back in the dust, staring into space. “The Bam-Kursh said he knew I would try to overthrow her if I wasn't kept busy so she licked me up in this pet and said I could get access to basic food and resources if I tortured any women he sent down here. The less resources I ask of him, the better resources I can get and the more women scream and suffer, the more of a free hand I am given”

Butterfly sighed “The man who founded the conspiracy to eat sylphs for the supposed good of all becomes the woman responsible of running hell for the actual good of all.”

The Unleasher nodded “No greater torture for me than that.”

Butterfly squeezed the Unleasher's hand “Hey this place is clean, the women are clothed and you are slowly militarising the place. It's a success.”

The Unleasher said without emotion “If your plan doesn't work I'm going to have to farm you and your friends. We need the resources and you need to suffer.”

Butterfly rolled over and hugged the Unleasher “It's alright, we'll get out of here.”

The Unleasher broke down in tears “I really don't want to harvest from Iris. I just want one person to make it through this place without being tortured.”

Butterfly nuzzled the Unleasher “You know the other Lucy is a me from another universe where she got turned into a sylph by the Great Farsh-nuke?”

The Unleasher nodded “The weight that's on that woman's shoulders, I don't know how she can bare it.”

Butterfly couldn't think of anything else to say so she just hugged the Unleasher until the tears went away.

Galla spoke up “I know where to find our clothes.”

The Unleasher stared at her “Where?”

Galla shut her eyes for a moment and said “They're in the soldier enclosure, they can be thrown down the rubbish chute at any time. I just need to give the word.”

“Okay” said the Unleasher “How?”

Galla shrugged “It's the Venus Trap. My soul scattered throughout the multiverse. That's what bought you all here, I'm trying to rebuild myself. Fortunately while I was off the grid the other parts of my soul that were large enough worked to help us. Now how are we going to do this? I think we should send Butterfly.”

“No, I'll go” said the Unleasher

“Do you normally collect the rubbish? If you don't then you risk ruining everything. Butterfly is a known adversary of the Bam-Kursh so there's plausible deniability and she's a wereshark and a fairy so she can stand to make the mission.” said Galla.

“I am not letting you put her in danger” said the Unleasher

“Give the word” said Butterfly and she started running

Galla glared at the Unleasher

The Unleasher grumbled “Give the word”

Butterfly ran across the pit, hurdling the sick or the fallen and dodging guards that lashed out with their sticks. She made it to the bottom of the chute and found the bundle of clothes laving atop a large metal catch area that had been covered in teeth. She grabbed the clothes and ran back.

Galla and the Unleasher were screaming at each other when Butterfly returned.

Butterfly handed over the clothes “Would you two stop tearing into one another I got it done and once we're ready I think you'll find we can be more than a match for the Bam-Kursh.”

“See, I told you” said Galla

The Unleasher glared at Galla “Fine”

“Fine, what?” asked Butterfly.

The Unleasher took the clothes from Butterfly and handed them to Iris “Go hide these somewhere safe.

Butterfly stared at the Unleasher “What is it? What were you arguing about?”

“Whether our cover is worth so much” whispered the Unleasher then she grabbed Butterfly's arm and took her over to the short ginger woman.

The ginger woman said “Unleasher, you don't normally take people to make their donations?”

The Unleasher shook her head and swallowed before taking a deep breath and yelling “Silence rabble!”

The chatter and the screams stopped.

The Unleasher cried “You all know me! You all know how much I help you and look after you!? Well this is what happens when you try to escape! Sister Lucille Danse of the Sylph Liberation Front you are to be harvested of all your organs and bones and skin while still alive without pain relief! Your regeneration has been stopped and you shall suffer a slow and lingering death for the benefit of all!”

Butterfly cried out in shock and pain as the Unleasher walked away and the ginger woman laid her onto the operation table.

The Unleasher walked back to Galla and Butterfly's friends and said “There is nothing you can say that will be a patch on how I feel about myself right now.”

The Unleasher slumped against the wall of the pit and sobbed into Butterfly's still beating heart.

The Venus Trap Part 15 The Collosseum

The Venus Trap
Alex Jahans
Online Version
Part 15 – The Collosseum

Lucy woke up with only sa vague idea of why she was where was but at least this time she was clothes. Then she heard the cheering and the clapping and opened her eyes to find herself lying on sand in the middle of Rome's famous collosseum. She go to her feet and assessed the stands, women of many different species were cheering and a great green eye projected from a hovering bug in the centre of the collosseum watched over events.


Lucy felt a great stabbing pain in her left side then realised it was a literal stabbing pain as her attacker heal palmed her forehead and a hidden blade impaled her in her left eye.

In the second or two before her shock wore off and the pain kicked in Lucy bought her knee up into her attacker's chest, elbowed her in the back of the neck, picked her up threw her, stamped on her hands and started running.

Then the pain hit.

“Son of a bitch!” Lucy covered her left eye warily and circled her attacker warily “What the fuck was that about!?”

Lucy's attacker wore a very custom spec outfit designed to help with climbing, running and taking on an army with stealth and surprise. It looked like a costume with overtones of badass suit and the renaissance.

Her attacker said “His Royal Highness Flavia Galla The Bam-Kursh has decreed that we must fight to the death for his enjoyment. The victor gets 10 years imprisonment and rehabilitation. The loser is fed to those in the pit.”

Lucy nodded, understanding “Who are you?”

Her attacker laughed “You want me to tell you with his lord high overlord watching?”

Lucy shrugged and pulled her hand away for a nervous blink “In my experience Big Brother has already made you his plaything or he can't fucking touch you. Either way it don't matter. What's your name?”

Her attacker nodded, understanding “You make a surprising amount of sense for a sylph who'll be dead in a moment. Emilia Auditorie of the Sylph Allied liberation Front at your service.”

Lucy blinked again “Neat. So you're just toying with me to get information right? And you're going to kill me?”

Emilia nodded “I'm a Salfy, I have to give you a chance it's only right. As is the need to extract information. A corpse tells no tales. Sorry about killing you by the way, it's like Peta putting down weak and injured animals. I only do it because I care.”

Lucy blinked and flexed, perfectly healed. “Well Emilia, I am First Officer Lucy Danse of the UCMS Paragon. I am the heir to the first Great Farsh-nuke and I am the woman expected to lead a war for the sake of all the multiverse-”

Lucy dashed forward and grabbed Emilia's sword and tugged. Ignoring Emilia's attempts to impale her as she ran back to the opposite end of the collosseum and raised the sword defensively. “And now that we are at an even chance, why don't you let me know what you can do?”

Emilia cried “You're the woman who inspired the SALF! You're the woman destined to save us from the Septagonoids and Logicios! I can't kill you! It'd kill everything my movement is about.”

Lucy gave the sword a few practice swings “My life a lot less important than you think and to that end I am willing to let you win this fight if you can prove to me that you are worth more than I am.”

Emilia shook her head “I'll fall on my sword, I can't kill you.”

“No. You can't.” said Lucy, staring into Emilia's eyes “You can liquify my brain though and that should be enough for my purposes. Justify yourself.”

Emilia swallowed “Justify myself? You really want this?” Emilia charged forward and stabbed Lycy in the heart as she whispered “I hunt Logicios”

Lucy laughed, the wound already healing “I hunt pure logic and we are dealing with things that make Logicios look like sylphs.”


A small blade embedded itself in Lucy's jugular vein, tearing it open.

Lucy pulled out the blade and tossed it away harmlessly as her jugular vein scabbed over. “You'll have to do better than that.”

Emilia fired a pistol and Lucy's left leg was blown out from under her. As Lucy fell Emilia stabbed her in the chest and snapped her neck. “Well I have taken down the occasional Farsh-nuke”

Lucy picked up the remains of her left leg and handed it to Emilia “Put it in a jar of Agar Jelly and my blood. You have my permission to keep the resulting clone of me as your pet.”

Emilia rolled her eyes and stamped down on Lucy's chest, cracking her ribs “You really don't die easily do you?”

Lucy laughed “Shut up and I'll tell you how.”

Emilio groaned and reclaimed her sword “Fine. Tell me, how do I leave this arena alive?”

“Wide beam burst from that gun of yours up my nostril and obey the woman who looks like me but has wings.”

Emilio laughed “As you wish. Now please, stay dead.”

Emilio bent down and fired a wide beam burst from her pistol up Lucy's left nostril. The top of Lucy's head and the entirety of her brain was vaporised.

The great green eye of the Bam-Kursh stared at her and announced “You win. Proceed through the newly opened door.”


The Hooded Justice woke up in the Collosseum to find her grappling gun missing from her holster and a frightened soccer mum waving it at her “I will kill you!”

The Hooded Justice understood instantly: Gladiatorial fight to the death with prisoners.

“Except you haven't, have you?” said the Hooded Justice as she got to her feet. “I was out cold, you took my gun. You could've killed me. But you didn't?”

The woman waved the gun “I just want to go back home to Damian and the kids. I never wanted anything other than to get married, have 2.4 children and retire to Tuscany. I have a life to get back to.”

“I know” said the Hooded Justice “But let's be honest, you aren't going to fire that gun are you?”

The woman shook her head “I will kill you. I need to get back to my husband.”

“I know” said the Hooded Justice, approaching the woman slowly and carefully “You know I'm married myself? She is so strong and so tough. I feel so safe around her. I mean I'm just a geek who dresses up for conventions but she? She keeps me right.”

The woman nodded “My Damian's like that. He proposed atop the Eiffel Tower, dressed as Leonardo Davinci. I've gotta see him again.”

“I know” said the Hooded Justice, inching ever closer. “And you'd kill to get back?”

The woman nodded, biting her lip. “I'm so sorry.”

“It's okay” said the Hooded Justice, easily disarming the woman.

The woman burst into tears.

The Hooded Justice stowed the grappling gun then hugged the woman “Hush. Hush. It's alright. I'm going to get home.” She snapped the woman's neck and declared “Next time give me a real challenge!”


Theodora Lomanchi, noted elven Night Witch, champion of the battle of Ettersburg smirked as she looked at the sleeping orc. It was childish she knew and just a bit uncivilised to wait for a woman to wake up before you killed them but Theodora wanted to see the look of terror on her face as a dozen huge spells obliterated her.

Olaf Gamalzes woke up and stood up and was immediately hit with enough spells to turn him into a flaming pile of raspberry jam.

Theodora laughed “Poor bastard.”

Olaf slowly pulled herself together as Theodora watched.

As she flexed her renewed limbs she said “I'm a wereshark, bitch.” and threw herself at Theodora.

Theodora stood no chance as the orc ripped out her internal organs.


A tall charming beautiful dark skinned brunette was sitting beside Galla as she woke. “Pleasure to meet you, I'm Iris. I'm a journalist and part time superhero. I can rewind, pause or fast forward time. This is a gladiatorial contest whereby the loser gets fed to the rats and the winner gets imprisonment. What's your name?”

“Galla Placidia” said Galla “And I am so sincerely sorry but I did not go through all this just to throw my life away to let another young woman live. You'll have to kill yourself.”

“I'm sorry” said Iris

“That knife you're hiding behind your back in case I try to kill you. Use it to slit your throat.” said Galla.

Iris laughed “I'm not killing myself.”

Galla nodded “I was worried you wouldn't but things really would be so much simpler and easier if you killed yourself. You might even live to be an asset to me in the future.”

Iris chuckled “No, we're going to work together and get out of here.”

Galla sighed “I'm sorry I don't like doing this but I must”

Iris picked up the knife and slit her throat.

“Pro tip” said Galla “Obey the elder gods. They have more powers than you can imagine.”


Butterfly woke up to find a small ginger kitten curled up beside her. She stroked the vkitten and asked “Hey bunnikin, any idea where we are.”

“The Bam-Kursh said we are to fight to the death for the right to go to prison.” said the cat.

Butterfly laughed “There is no such thing as talking cats or the Farsh-nuke would own so many and there would be at least one for every sylph in the entire multiverse.”

The cat nodded and walked away, turning into a tall dark skinned and beautiful woman. “Indeed Lucy Badass of the Sylph Liberation Front, you would be an authority on the subject of the Bam-Kursh. I am infact a Mutite Shark. Technically hermaphroditic so fuck knows why I'm here but I guess my identifying as a woman and favouring this appearance may have tipped the scales. I call myself Bernice but you may call me Benny.”

Butterfly's jaw dropped as she got to her feet. “Bennykin, I swear upon all that I hold dear that I am now the champion of your species because Jesus Criminy Heck the Farsh-nuke needs to see this. A shark that can become a beautiful woman or a cat. I mean just look at you!”

Bernice nodded “Thank you I appreciate that you appreciate my species. Now tell me, do I have to kill you?”

Butterfly shook her head and retched.

After a moment Butterfly vomited up a small black ping pong ball, she threw it at the ground and Kitty, Flitzy and Her Royal Highness Queen Elizabeth The Second appeared armed with Plasma Rifles.

“Listen Bam-Cursed!” declared the Queen “I am the one true sovereign of this land and these are my girls so back the fuck off unless you want a face full of Septagonoid shredding void rounds!”

Kitty checked her quantum oscillator “I've located the prison, let's move.”

Flitzy, the Queen, Butterfly and Bernice followed Kitty to the prison. Doors sprang open and unlocked before them and soon Emilia, the Hooded Justice, Olaf and Galla joined them. Together they marched right up to the newly erected tower in the centre of Rome.

Snipers shot at Galla, The Hooded Justice and Butterfly moments before a thousand heavily armed soldiers appeared out of nowhere. The voice of the Bam-Kursh carried through speakers “Did you really think I wouldn't guard my own home? And thanks to your displays in the collosseum I know which ones to neutralise first. Those bullets you were shot with? They are programmed to hack into your souls and make you vulnerable. Hooded Justice, you are now autistic. Galla you are trapped in your body. Butterfly you are now effectively human. No triple threat, wereshark, fairy and sylph protection for you. Incidentally all three of you have been rigged with time bombs that will vaporise you in 24 hours unless you try to hurt me, in which case you'll be vaporised instantly.”

Emilia whispered to Butterfly “Lucy is probably alive and kicking in the pit. I say discretion is the better part of valour.”

Butterfly nodded “Fine! Just don't you dare send us all into the pit!”


They woke up in the pit to the sound of screaming.